Friday, November 14, 2008

Strawberry, Banana, Watermelon or Ki Wii?

Apple was trying so hard to find his dad, finally he did it! The process was literally a tragedy or a disaster to him and yet he still remember how difficult was it.

He met Mr.Strawberry, but Mr.Strawberry has a son and a daughter and yet never betray his wife yet.

Mr.Banana told him that he has a son, but his son was murdered by a human while he was walking on street.

Apple saw this and he thought it might be his dad, but in fact he didn't know this is a pregnant watermelon.

Finally, Mr.Ki Wii approached him and told him that he is the long lost father of him. And the Apple was a little astonished by the news.

If you like Ki Wii and you enjoyed playing tennis, boxing, racing or even dancing in your house, now u will definitely desire to convey the console to outdoor or wherever you want. Here is the trouble, how can you play your Ki Wii in class, car or even on street without the provision of electricity and television?


It was a mission impossible, hence you need the son of
Ki Wii. Yes, Apple's iPod Touch has turned this mission to the mission possible! It is small, but in still it has a big touch screen as a game console. It is just like a gameboy! iPod Touch is not merely a MP3 player with sleek design, but with its new genius features included in the 2nd Generation of iPod Touch, you feel more action and fun!

You don't need a built-in button for your game console now!







Turn to the left.














Turn to the right.













Watch out the river! Move down your left hand!












You are safe now! Be fast and furious!







This is not your imagination nor your dream. You don't need a button to play the games! You just need to move your console and touch its body! Apple says, "I am not Mariah Carey, but please touch my body...". Meanwhile, you can listen to Mariah Carey's songs with its built-in speaker! Yes, it has built-in speaker! Woot~

Watch the 30 seconds video below to get the picture of my story immediately. There are hundreds of games you could download from the iTunes store for free!


In spite of all the movements you can do with iPod Touch, intangible buttons will be installed based on the games' criteria. Personally, I love Super Mario Bros.


Caution! You can play in classroom!


But you still need to pretend as a nerd although you are playing it! "Dang dang dang, dang dang dang, dang~" (Super Mario Bro's soundtrack)

Sunday, November 9, 2008

I am becoming a Red Apple tonight!




I had a bad week. But it was a past now. To celebrate the new coming week, I got myself a pack of Cottage Fries and a bottle of cheap wine, I really love wine.

The wine opener in my house is gone, so I got a new one. I don't have any spell that I could use to suck the damn wine cork.


The bad thing is arriving, once I open the cover of the wine, I saw a small tunnel. THERE IS NO WINE CORK INSIDE! So I just wasted my own money to get them a new wine opener. Anyway, tonight I am becoming a Red Apple!









I like to move it move it,

She likes to move it move it,
We like to move it move it,
MOVE IT!

Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa is coming to GSC Malaysia on the 13rd November 2008!







Thursday, November 6, 2008

Apple, The Sex Machine

The Best Sex Machine Award goes to...(*drum rolls*) The Apple!

Do you know that apple has an extremely good stamina and so good on bed? I meant it is good on bed if an apple could really have a hot sex. Apple pwned them all!

If only Apple can give a fuck...





Hmmm
...I assume the guy has learned some Chinese Kungfu, he can float and do the job!


(The digital clock shows 23:18)











Erm...now he turned to Superman? Superhorse perhaps.


(The digital clock shows 00:45)














The girl seems like wilted or an exhausted chick.



(The digital clock shows 02:10)











He is really like a sex machine. Celebrity scandal photo: Britney Fears and Green Aper.



(The digital clock shows 03:26)











Finally, they finished their romance.



(The digital clock shows 05:38)



They did that for 6 hours?!







Can you believe it?!
Oops, I hope you will have your parents' accompaniment to educate you while you are reading this topic if you are below 18 years old. Back to the story, Apple is hard, firm, robust and vigorous. And that's not all! This is the girl's favorite part, it is LONG-LASTING too! If man have the battery life like the apples do while having sex, isn't that fantastic? Apple Inc. products are distinct in appearance, and yet their battery life. Do you wanna see how the apples pwned the others? hehe...


5 hours later...


5 more hours later...


Talk time for iPhone3G: Up to 10hours

Talk time for Samsung i900 Omnia: Up to 5 hours 50mins


Result: Samsung i900 Omnia, YOU GOT PWNED!



4 hours later...



an hour later...


Battery Life for Macbook: 5 hours
Battery Life for Sony VAIO VGN-CR353: 4 hours
Battery Life for Sony VAIO VGN-FW12G: 2.5 hours


Result: Sony VAIO, YOU GOT PWNED!



The ending of "muac-muac-muac" will never be good...


Battery Life for iPod Nano: Up to 24 hours audio playtime

Battery Life for Creative Zen V Plus: Up to 16 hours audio playtime

Battery Life for iPod Classic: Up to 36 hours audio playtime, 6 hours video playtime

Battery Life for Creative Zen X-Fi: Up to 36 hours audio playtime, 5 hours video playtime


Result: Creative Zen, YOU GOT PWNED!
lalala......lalala......

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Condoms for Apples

This is not an offensive post to the underage group of my readers. It is something more educational. From the online free dictionary, the definition of condom is a flexible sheath which made of rubber that designed to cover the penis during intercourse. In a nutshell, it is just a balloon on penis. Therefore you might think…condoms for apples are something similar like this...

Ha-ha…I need to bring out the point now. The condom for apple just the description of the protection skin for Apple Inc. product. iSkin has released many trendy and useful skins and covers for all range of Apple Inc. product, from iPod, iPhone to Mac. The colours of the condom skins are alike with the colour palette of rainbow. Withal, there are some products have attracted me the most and really eye-catching.


This is a condom packaging.



This is not a condom packaging,

but it is iSkin Keyboard Protector packaging!


The design of this keyboard protector fits the best for the keyboard of Apple MacBook and PC. It has arctic, sonic, purple, apple green and orange colour! It keeps the noise down for typing and maintains the hygiene of your keyboard. Less friction and less dust!

ATTENTION!

Mouse wears condom now! Ha-ha…Is it Mickey Mouse? NO! It is Mighty Mouse!

NONO, it is not like this! Stop your dirty thought!

This is the Mighty Mouse! And you are right, they have protection sheath too!

It is simple and stylish with the outstanding colours available in the market. Giving your Mighty Mouse a good shell can save you from buying a new costly mouse replacement!

Play safe everyone!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Non-imported Apple

Can you name the identity of this hand tool?

1. Apple Walkie-Talkie
2. iPhone
3. Eye-phone

Think wisely, look at the image closely.

Perhaps you need to get a wider monitor screen.

It’s time to put on your glasses…

3,
2,
1…


The answer is iPhone 3G!!! Gotcha~ I am sure nobody answers that precisely. For those who did correctly, you will be receiving a big blessing from me. And it’s time for you to grab a new iPhone 3G from the retail store! Unfortunately, you can’t get it from my lovely country, Malaysia.

Cellphone has evolved so much with dazzling designs and functions. Do you still remember the very first gigantic cellphone in the past? Yea, you will definitely smile when the image flashes back through your memory now.

This first generation of gigantic cellphone is big like hammer and heavy like elephant.

What can you do with this dumbbell-alike cellphone in your hand?

1. Call 911 and it takes your entire body strength to press the
buttons.
2. Do exercise as its weight could really burn off your body calories.
3. Show off that you own a huge cellphone as nobody does. (you can’t hide it anyway)
4. Provide your eyes with the healthiest vision as it only has green light on screen.

I know you must be thinking I am exaggerating it. However, it is true! What makes iPhone 3G stands out from the crowd? It is not about SMS, MMS, GPRS, built-in camera, audio and video playback, and etc. It is something more fun and exhilarating!

iPhone 3G has the best Multi-Touch function and it allows you to control everything by your fingertips! The high sensitivity and feasibility of its multi-touch software make anything possible! You can flick, tap, pinch on screen to glide your photo display and zoom in and out whenever you like! I am using ‘glide’, yes it glides! Your fingertip turns into an invisible cursor now!

Let me show you how it works!
Step 1:
Put your fingertips on the screen.

Step 2:
Glide one of your fingertips to upward direction.



Now the picture has been zoomed in!




Nowadays, the peoples are very concern on the vision of graphic. The houses are commencing to be occupied with widescreen TV, widescreen monitor, and widescreen portable game system. Hence, the technology of iPhone 3G also enhanced to follow the flows of the wide-screen trend. The wide screen display is not the only appealing factor but the movement of display takes the pride!

As simple as it is, what you need to do is to ROTATE! In Chinese we called rotate as ‘转 (zhuan)’, and in Japanese we called it as ‘kaiten shimasu’. The result of rotation is amazing and bizarre!


Don’t try this at home.


Your television won’t able to perform this magic, or you will see stars and birds when your mom smacks your head down.


What's next?

3G, Wi-Fi, and GPS just blow you away!

You will never be lost in anywhere with the aid of multiple functions invented!


GPS serves as your traveling navigator no matter where you are! It detects the signals from GPS satellite, Wi-Fi spots, or even cellular towers to tell you the most precise location. Now you can trek into South Africa or dive into Maldives, you will still able to know your exact spot as long as you can get the signal from either one of the ways. Hold on a second, just to remind you that iPhone 3G is not a water-resistant cellphone.

3G and Wi-Fi features enable you to browse the email and surf the porn website anytime and anywhere. For those who can’t wait to read their emails immediately, this is what you desire.

The speed of 3G can be described as 3F, Fast, Fxcking Fast, and Fery Fery Fast!

And to all the Malaysian fans of iPhone 3G, please wait longer for the import.